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I’m a 22 year old living in Ontario in the Greater Toronto Area/Hamilton Area. I was studying computer science in university but decided to quit it and change my field to something else. I’m in that stage right now and I’m really confused. Due to a lot of pressure in picking a field and other problems in my life I long for a companion. And of course shaitan tries to put haram in the way when we are in this state. So for Allah’s sake, I decided to try to get married in order to save myself from fitnah. But I’m not settled and I don’t have a job so I thought misyar would be best. I know they are women who are in certain situations that they would prefer this type of marriage too so I thought it would be a good deed to go through this path even though I would be marrying an older woman. I have accepted it and I’m actually very excited to be there for a good woman wanting to stay pure even if she is older than me and has kids. More good deeds is how I see it, alhamdulillah!
Also I know that it is haram to get into a marriage with the intention of ending it so I’m not here to, may Allah protect us, take advantage of any woman. I actually would prefer more of a social relationship too that we joke with each other and be like each other’s best friend in a way. If I visit I help around the house and with problems that may be going about. I want a misyar marriage that is both fulfilling physically and emotionally/mentally. I’m fine with my wife choosing one more than the other, I’m flexible in this matter.
When it comes to this, my motto is as it comes in a narration that the best of you are the best to their wives. So I seek to be the best to my wife as much as I can, her feelings over mine.
As for my personality, I’m easy-going and like bubbly, I like to make jokes and to help people smile. Islam is really important to me so if something is halal or haram, I try to take it seriously. I hope this marriage even though it wouldn’t be traditional would help us get closer to our Rabb.